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Amazon Driver Piss Turns into High-Promoting Vitality Drink

It’s simple to snigger about Piss Jugman, however piss jugs are an actual drawback. Not solely do they turn into biohazards when tossed on the facet of the highway, however in addition they solely exist as a result of corporations don’t give drivers sufficient time to go to the toilet the conventional means. One firm that’s infamous for anticipating drivers to do that is Amazon. So when documentary maker Oobah Butler discovered a bunch of piss bottles exterior an Amazon success middle, he determined to drag a stunt to get Amazon’s consideration.

First, he talked with quite a lot of Amazon drivers to substantiate that the piss bottles had been theirs, as he explains on this latest Vice article. Unsurprisingly, the reply was sure. “I solely do that as a result of I’ve no different choices,” one driver advised him. “Different individuals who go slower simply find yourself getting fired.” And it’s not only a drawback within the U.S. Butler spoke to drivers in Italy, Spain and the UK who all advised the identical story. His resolution? Gather precise piss jugs from Amazon drivers after which promote them on Amazon.

Nevertheless, as a substitute of simply posting pictures of the pee bottles on the itemizing, Butler determined to provide it just a little branding:

However what would it not appear to be? I sit down in my basement for a day with my buddy Stan Cross, a author and visible artist, and we toss some names round. Drive? It’s already taken. #1? An excessive amount of. How about one thing that does precisely what it says on the tin: “Launch”. Or “Launch Vitality”, to be exact. It’s good.

Now, I need some taglines that actually seize the ingenuity of this product, and I’ve some concepts. “The world’s first totally reusable vitality drink”, “when you’re completed with its contents, merely fill it again as much as the brim and begin once more” and naturally, “infinite refills”.

Now, for the design, and Stan has one thing up his sleeve. Bask within the glory of Launch Vitality’s vivid color [sic] and shrewd advertising and marketing.

Regardless of itemizing urea as an ingredient and having no paperwork proving his product was protected for human consumption, Amazon let him checklist the piss bottles on the market and mechanically moved Launch Vitality into the vitality drink class. After loads of effort, Butler was capable of get it listed as a bitter lemon drink. Once more, there was no pushback from Amazon. In spite of everything, who cares if somebody is promoting literal human urine so long as ole Bezos will get a minimize of it?

Ultimately, Launch Vitality was faraway from the Amazon retailer however not earlier than it really grew to become the top-ranked drink within the bitter lemon class. In an announcement, Amazon advised Vice, “Security is a high precedence for Amazon and we require all merchandise provided in our retailer to adjust to relevant legal guidelines and rules. We now have industry-leading instruments to forestall genuinely unsafe merchandise being listed and we monitor our shops for real product security considerations.”

There’s, after all, much more that goes into promoting Amazon driver piss on Amazon, so head over to Vice to learn the entire thing for your self. Or simply to see the design they got here up with for Launch Vitality. We promise it received’t disappoint.

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